Cha..Cha..Cha...Changes

Ronnie's going in for a tune-up soon, and man, I'm scared. I'm not going to sugar coat it at all. I'm really nervous about it. Wow, nothing like just coming out with it..boom...my insecurities right in your face on this lovely Monday morning. Ha!

We have always been very vocal about the fact that we kind of look forward to hospital stays in the Sharpe household. They have always been a time when we can take a hiatus from the normal routine; spend time "camping" together; reconnect; etc. But this hospital stay with be the first of the NEW hospital stays - now that Mckenna is here. We don't quite know how it will look exactly, but being the planner I am, I've sure tried to predict what it'll be like and how it will all work. Mckenna and I will likely split our time between home and visiting Ronnie, but it will just be during the day, and at night I'll be staying at home or at Ronnie's parent's house. We don't know what nights we'll spend where quite yet, but we do know it wouldn't be in the hospital, as the hospital isn't quite the ideal place for a 3 month old to sleep. And I may be the only person on earth to say this, but I'm sad that I don't get to spend the nights there anymore. I loved sleeping on my little cot, tucked in the corner. I loved calling out, "goodnight. I love you," before bed and waking up to see my love zonked out. But I'm looking at the bright side, Mckenna's sweet face is a close second to wake up to :)

Not only will nights be different. But instead of unplugging a bit during hospital stays, now I'll be increasing my "work load." Becoming a single momma for several days a week, and 7 nights a week, on top of having to work will be very interesting, to say the least. I know I will figure it out, but it will be quite the adjustment to figure out how to navigate being the sole caregiver while working. I know I can manage, but it'll take a little to get the hang of. Luckily my workplace is AWESOME and truly practice what they preach when they say family first. So when I'm down with Ronnie (my office is down there), I can bring Mckenna to work with me, which will be a huge blessing. The real challenge will be sneaking work in during naps, and while she's playing independently. Everything besides Mckenna and work will fall by the way-side I'm afraid.

The nice thing is some of my favorite hospital traditions can still happen. We can still do Dunkin' on the mornings I'm there. We can still get in long, fun walks. We can't still snuggle in his tiny bed - and even better, we'll have a third there with us! We can still walk down and get freshly baked cookies from the cafeteria. We can still listen to John Jay and Rich radio show podcasts. We can still do tons of my favorite things. So I'm trying to focus on that, when I start to get bummed and scared about what this hospital stay will bring.

Anywhoo, there you have it. I'm scared, but a tiny bit excited to see just what I can do on my own (gulp - I'm not quite supermom yet). I think the fact that this post is a bit all over the place shows the chaos that is my brain trying to noodle through how it'll all work. Leave some suggestions if you've got 'em!