Somehow I Stumbled Upon Her

I was so inspired by Mandi's blog yesterday, that I decided to write a response to her blog...sort of. I'm not going to go into all of the reasons that I think CF is a blessing or the reasons that I don't hate Cystic Fibrosis (since Mandi nailed it), but I am going to heap praise on my wife. My one and only.

I am blessed.

There's no doubt about it, I am one blessed man. From the loving family I was born into, to the loving family I am now leading, I am blessed beyond measure. I often think that it's time to pinch myself, but there is no way that I want to wake up from this dream if that is in fact what is going on. I mean, I sometimes feel guilty. I catch myself saying "What did I do to deserve all of this?". I cannot think of a single reason as to why God would choose to bestow such blessings upon me.

That however, is the good news - it has nothing to do with me. God has blessed me richly because that's His perfect plan. His perfect plan could also have my own little world come crashing down tomorrow. Nobody knows what the future holds but Him. I take comfort in the fact that come feast or famine, it's all part of God's perfect plan.

God created Mandi with me in mind.

There aren't many women out there who could fall in love with a guy like me. My faults are many and my good qualities are few. Add on top of it the very different life that I live, and I'm not exactly what most people would consider a catch. Yet, in spite of all of my downfalls, I stumbled upon a woman who loves every character trait, quirk, struggle, fault, and cell in my being...even the jacked up CF one.

It doesn't stop there. She not only loves everything about me, but she'll even credit my jacked up CF cells with crafting me into the man she fell in love with. As she has put it before; "In a weird way, I'm actually very thankful for your CF". There are not many women out there who have ever breathed those words. Yet, in His perfect plan, I decide to go to the movie June 27th, 2008.

I saw a movie that night with my future wife, the woman God hand-selected for me, and I didn't even know it. I was too busy watching some stupid movie to realize it was the beginning of my very own fairytale.

Mandi's doesn't hate CF + I am CF = Mandi doesn't hate me.

I really feel for the people out there who hate CF. I really, really feel for the kids out there who's parents vocalize how much they hate CF. You know what that says to some kids? That you hate them.

I accepted at a very young age that CF was a part of my life and it wasn't going away. CF was woven into the fabric of my being and in some respect, was just simply who I was. So, if I accepted that, but then was told by my parents that they "hated CF", how could one not see that as hating something about you that is never going away? See how that can work?

Thankfully, Mandi has expressed from very early on in our relationship, that there is nothing she would change about me - not even CF. She doesn't hate it. She loves what it's done for me. She loves what it's done for us. She loves what it will do for our family.

Wanting something to be gone and hating that something are worlds apart where I'm from. I want CF to be gone, but I will never, ever hate it.

The end.

Delayed Mandi Monday and Early Birthday Breakdown

Yet another Mandi Monday where my blog was practically posted on Tuesday. This time, again, my excuse is poor. The weekend flew by and this morning, my usual last minute posting-writing time, was jam packed with my 4:40AM core class, my run (which today was a lazy walk), breakfast, shower, and the exciting civil act of jury duty! Yippee! 

If you're wondering, I wasn't selected, but I did go and give it my best effort. I mean, who wouldn't select juror number 25, sporting red shoes with tassels? Nothing screams impartial and unbiased like a red pair of suede flats, right? Anywho, I wasted 6 hours of my day hurrying up and waiting...but hey, at least Mr. Slip and Fall got his day in court.

So this week is the week. This is the week I go from having a baby to a toddler. Mckenna turns one on Wednesday, and I have to say, it's very bittersweet. This time last year I was sitting on my couch, peacefully enjoying a whole Saturday afternoon of uninterrupted TV. Parents - remember those Saturdays? Non-parents - enjoy one for me this week, would ya? This time last year I had no idea that I'd only have another day to feel Mckenna's sweet kicks and nudges as she repositioned in my belly. This time last year I had no idea that in 12 hours I'd have my water break in bed, at 3:30AM. This time last year I had no idea my birthday would be spent in labor. And this time last year I had no idea my entire world was about to be rocked with the best birthday gift I've ever received.

I have never had a birthday like I had last year. And over the next few days, I'll relive those glorious hours through a couple blog posts, but all I can say is it was the best birthday I've ever had. I would relive that day every year on my birthday if I could. Being in labor is one of the most meaningful and beautiful experiences of my life. For someone who wasn't sure if they'd get to ever experience pregnancy and labor, I can tell you that no contraction is too strong or push is too painful. It was a time spent enjoying the day bonding with my husband and feeling overwhelmingly blessed. I have never felt more empowered and amazed by how perfectly God created a woman! 

And while I would love to relive last year's birthday over and over again, I wouldn't want to be anywhere in time other than now. I used to selfishly rejoice my own life on the 16th of each October, but now I celebrate my "special day" by reflecting on the perfect little blessing I got on (well 44 minutes after) my birthday. No package wrapped up with a bow could ever compete with the gift I received from God, and each year I get the blessing of remembering the gift that just keeps on giving.

This last year (which we will recap the highlights in a special birthday post) has been one of the most lesson-filled and blessed years of my life. We have had so many firsts as a family this year, as we've watched Mckenna grow from a little 6lb 2oz, 17inch peanut; to a walking, "talking," toddler, full of spunk, personality and intelligence. It is so bittersweet to think of all of the firsts that we will never have again. All of the stages she's already progressed through. All of the growth that has been done. There are so many memories I would love to relive again. But holy smokes am I excited for the next year to come. I can't wait to watch the spunk turn to sass as she realizes her independence (at the time, I know I'll hate it, but what an incredible step in a kids life); her personality come through more and more with every new word she learns and phrase she masters; and her intelligence continue to amaze us as she learns new skills. 

This week is one that will be met with both happy tears and sad - but both from a place of celebration.

So here's to our birthday week, baby girl!!

The Impact of an Accident

This blog is actually less about the accident and more about the impact of that accident (pun intended)....

Mr brother, Grant, and his friends were on their way to California for spring break this week and got into a car accident on the way. Before you panic, everything is okay, but the car they were driving is now inoperable. They were coming up from Tucson on I-10 through Phoenix and got into the fender bender at the same exit you would take to get to my house. Kind of crazy right? My brother called me to see if I could pick them up while they figure out the plan. I was not able to to do because we're down to one car and Mandi was out with it at that time.

Side note: We're down to one car because my other brother, Andrew, is using our Corolla while his car gets fixed in a body shop - yes, he was in an accident too (not his fault though)

The boys ended up throwing around a football in a truck stop parking lot waiting for Andrew to pick them up when he got done with one of his clients. The whole group came over to watch the Arizona-Colorado PAC-12 Championship game (I'd rather not talk about it). It was of course nice to watch that game with both of my brothers and was the first time this season I was able to do so (usually it's just Andrew and I).

The car got towed back down to Tucson and then the following day, Andrew took the whole group to a mid-point between Phoenix and Tucson so they could get a ride back home.

Soooo, what was the point of all that? If you're still reading, thank you for bearing with me. Here's the point: Grant called me a couple of nights ago bumming out about his spring break trip being ruined because of the accident. He asked if he could drive back up to Phoenix and just spend the week with Mandi and I. Uhhhh, yeah!!! See what happened there?

Grant might not be doing exactly what he thought he'd be doing this week, but he's still having a great time. We've been able to hang out a bunch in the last couple of days, and do some stuff together that rarely get the chance to do. He really likes gardening, and it just so happened that this week was the week that I was setting my all up for the spring/summer! My brother Andrew helped me get started on Monday and then Tuesday, Grant helped me knock it out. Sometimes, even though things don't happen or workout the exact way we were picturing, they still tend to workout. I know that Grant is enjoying himself and we are certainly feeling very blessed to have him around.

Which leads me to my final point - there are times in our lives that may seem like a low point, but we must remember that it can still be an opportunity to bless others. Sure, I was bummed that Grant wasn't able to go out to California for spring break, BUT I feel so lucky that I get to spend the week with him. His misfortune has turned out to be a blessing to me and my family and, as I believe he'd agree, him also.

It's so easy to get stuck into thinking about how are present situation is affecting us, and us alone. It's a big world out there though. We may be going through a bad season for the sole purpose of showing someone else a good season in their life. Something in our life may become a burden only to lighten the load of someone else. It's always good to take a step back and look at various ways our own struggles can actually positively impact the lives of others. 

If we're able to do that, we just may see our car accident as a huge blessing.