Mandi's Eggs Are a-Cookin'!!!

We headed to our doctor's office to take a peak at Mandi's eggs, or as we call her Mother Hen, just to make sure everything is on schedule. It was a very important step as all that is IVF relies on the eggs developing at a normal pace. If they develop to slow there can be issues and conversely, if they develop to fast you may be having some problems. Worst case scenario - everything looks off and we have to cancel the cycle. To say Mandi was excited (see worried) about this appointment would be an understatement. As always, we'll try to give it to you in our own words first and then you can hear the expert talk it below. Seriously though, check out those ovaries!!!

Thankful Thursday - The Sun is ALWAYS Shining

We can't stress enough how important it is in our own lives to slow down when things seem to be getting "fast" and just think about the little things that we're thankful for. We had 4 other peeps join us last week in expressing their thankfulness and we're hoping that more climb on board today! I have a little "Linky Tools" at the end of this post that you can use to join the party and link up your thankfulness post! Feel free to spread this around to anyone you know that may like to participate.

Mandi's List:

I'm thankful for heating pads. The shots these last few days haven't been bad, but they do have a way of making my butt pretty sore. It was suggested to put a little heat pad onto the injection site to help move some of the meds out of the muscle, and believe you me, it feels AWESOME!

I'm thankful for birthdays. I am so thankful and feel so blessed to have celebrated Ronnie getting another year older yesterday. I LOVE birthdays and everything that comes with them - cake, cards, presents, the birthday song, you name it. I'm so blessed to have Ronnie in my life and I am so thankful that this marks another year of him growing older - although not wiser ;-)

I'm thankful for sunshine and Arizona weather. The midwest and north east was DUMPED on yesterday (anyone reading this get snowed in?!) and I am so thankful that we don't have to shovel our way out of our home in the winter time. After living in the midwest and north east growing up, and going to school in Syracuse, NY (where it's never sunny and ALWAYS cloudy) I am so thankful for the 360 sunny days in arizona and the bearable winter weather.

Ronnie's List:

I'm so thankful for a wife who isn't afraid to let me know when to shut up. I have a bad case of "foot-in-mouth" syndrome as what I mean to say isn't often what is actually said. Not only does she let me know when I should probably rephrase stuff or just completely quit talking, but she does it in a very respectful and loving way. You think I get in trouble now? It'd be 1000 times worse if Mandi wasn't around.

I'm thankful for all of the great birthday wishes I received yesterday. I'm not a big birthday guy (I requested that we watch Judge Judy together on the couch instead of going to dinner), but it is nice to read comments from others wishing you a great day or thanking you for doing something you're passionate about. It definitely provided me with some much needed energy heading into these next couple weeks. Thanks guys!

I'm thankful for a sun that seems to always be shining. Not only am I talking about this great Arizona sun (sorry to all of you who are getting dumped on by the whiteness right now), but I'm also talking about my life in general. It seems no matter what happens throughout the day, with my health or with the weather, the sun is always shining. I can't tell you how often I think about it being a great day for the simple fact that I'm able to wake up and tackle it.

Only 6 Years Left?

Yeah rizzzzight!!! I can't tell you guys how bonkers it drives me to hear that 37 number thrown around the community. You know the number I'm talking about right? 37 is the predicted median survival age for the CF community (here in America) according to the CFF. Since I'm turning 31 today, it got me thinking, should I just enjoy cash in my chips and enjoy the time I have left? I of course say that in jest as I would NEVER say that (and mean it), but to highlight an attitude that still is present in many of my close CF circles. We get fixated on a number that's thrown out there and then think we somehow have to live down to it or in some cases, spend our whole lives trying to attain it. Can I just say this, screw that number and screw statistics in general. I've never bought into the hype before and I certainly don't plan on buying into the hype now.

I was fortunate to develop this attitude at a very young age. I don't know why, but even as a youngster, I was able to see the forest through the trees. See, when I was born in 1980, that predicted median age of survival was hovering around 17. Even more so, there was an attitude present in the community to just "value the time you have" because "he probably won't see high school". Why do I remember this? Because I overheard a doctor say it. Not only did I hear doctors say it, but I saw many of my friends live it.

I'd like to introduce you to my friend Robbie. Robbie and I met at the hospital when we were kids and we connected right away. He was a few years older, but he was one of those "cool" CF kids that I longed to meet. You know, one who I thought was "just like me". There was one key difference however with me and Robbie. Robbie never did treatments. I used to question him all of the time as to why this was and to this day, I've never gotten an answer. Maybe it was because he was raised by a single mom who smoked in the house? I mean, she obviously didn't care, why should he. Maybe it's because they were on welfare and couldn't afford the latest and greatest in CF treatments? Maybe he heard the number 17 and thought to himself "what's the point"? I never did get a chance to get to the bottom of it, my friend Robbie died when he was 12. I still think of him to this day.

But this isn't a sad blog, see, even as a kid I knew I wasn't locked into Robbie's story. Shortly after he died, my mom cautiously approached me to assess how I felt about it all and to see if there was anything she could do. She asked if Robbie dying scared me at all. "I'm sad, but it doesn't scare me" I said "I'm not Robbie". "What do you mean?" she replied. I said, "Robbie didn't do his treatments and his mom never pounded him". Even back then I just couldn't buy into this whole "CF is CF" mentality and that we're all destined to the same fate or locked into some magical number. Again, screw that. Robbie should have never been included in any number or statistic that was ever thrown onto me. Sure, we both had CF, but that's were the similarities ended.

I feel the same way today. That 37 number means absolutely nothing to me. In fact, any number that includes the whole CF community means nothing to me. As long as those numbers include kids like Robbie who don't do treatments or have parents that don't give them a fighting chance, they mean nothing. We don't know what everybody else is doing out there. We do know however, that most surveys show that at least 50% of CFers do much less than or none of the treatments prescribed by their physicians. So I ask you, should they factor into any number that you hold up to yourself or your child? You obviously know my answer. Whether you pay attention to the numbers is up to you. I'm much more interested to hear about those who do what they have to do each day to have their lung function at it's highest possible position. If you don't care enough about yourself to do what you have to do to live a healthy life, then stay out of my statistics.

Now, inevitably, I'm going to get comments or emails saying something to the affect of "Ronnie, I hate you. I've done all of my treatments my entire life and I've exercised regularly since I was 4, yet my lung function continues to decline and I'm always sick. So just know that I do what I have to do and it still isn't working". Short response: You are in the minority. Not only are you in the minority of CFers that do all of their treatments everyday, but you're also in the minority of those that do all of their treatments and still can't get healthy. I generally like to focus on the majority, the majority of us who don't do everything we need to do to stay healthy and then wonder why we're sick. I've been there. I was living the "blind-folded excuse filled life" for many years. I know it's tough to own it and take responsibility for our own actions and choices, but man, once you do, it's just so much easier. You start to realize that we do in fact have a lot of control over this stupid cell disease and we have much more power than we give ourselves credit for. It's just a matter of biting the bullet and getting started.

With that said, on my birthday, here's my wish: I just want us all to commit to taking care of ourselves so in the near future we can see what the real predicted median age of this community. A community dedicated to treatments, exercise, self-worth and no excuses. I can guarantee you this, if we all committed, we'd see that 37 number WAY BACK in the rear-view mirror.

An Update from Clinic - It's Crunch Time

Yesterday, I had clinic for the first time since I got out of the hospital in mid-September. They'd like me to come to clinic more often, but with the frequency that I do clinical drug trials, I always have a pretty good idea of where I stand PFT wise. I don't know about all of you, but that's definitely the part I always look forward to come clinic time. I must add however that I'm certainly not doing what's best for me or best for my clinic. It's obviously a better situation if they're able to track me more closely and if you want to get down to the nuts and bolts of it - it's better for the center. Every CF clinic relies on outside funding to stay afloat, so the more patients they treat, the more money they get. If I'm not going to clinic, I'm not getting counted, therefore they don't get all of the money they deserve (do you see where this is going?). If they don't get the money they deserve, it not only affects me, but all of my great friends, including the doctors, at my clinic. Get it? Got it? Good!

As promised, I showed up to clinic yesterday looking forward to what they had to say. I've been off of my game for quite some time now because of all of the bleeding, so it's always a touchy situation heading in to see the docs in that condition. Like I told them, it's not that I feel terrible, it's that I haven't been able to "do me" for almost 3 weeks now. By that I mean I haven't been able to be as active and workout like I'm used to and it can obviously catch up in a fairly short time. I saw them 2 weeks ago (at a drug trial) and expressed to them that other than coughing up blood, I felt pretty darn good. I wasn't very tight, my cough was stable, my mucus was clear and my energy was up. Yesterday I had to report that the blood is still an issue and now the 3 weeks of not working out is starting to catch up to me. I find myself tighter than usual. My mucus is becoming thicker. My cough is deeper, yet it's harder to move the gunk out. The sucky part is, I don't feel it's a result of CF as much as it's a result of me not being able to keep CF in check. And that is very frustrating.

I'm a "let's solve the problem" kind of a guy instead of sit around and talk about it. This happens to translate very well to my CF life as I'm able to look back on the past and pick out stuff that's worked for me health wise and stuff that hasn't. Once I identify what works, I don't go on and on about what I should be doing or what I wish I would have done, I strap up my boots and I go for it. Right now, I find myself in a situation that I can't "go for it" and it pisses me off. My bleeding has become so frequent that I'm not able to do full strength Vest treatments. When I bleed, I stop Pulmozyme for a bit and I stay off 7%. Exercising is out of the questions. Do you see how this can be a problem? Talk about a better way to feel worse! Believe me, this is it.

Some of you are probably saying, "well, why don't you get your butt into the hospital then???". To you I say, you guys are 100% correct. I present myself as a no-excuses kind of a guy and I feel like a hypocrite for putting it off. But part of who I am is to be open and honest with this blog and use it as a way to hold myself accountable. An even bigger part of that is acknowledging when I'm going against my own advice and call myself out on it. So that's exactly what I'm doing. Let me be loud and clear, I should be going into the hospital and nipping this whole thing in the bud. I should put my health before all other things I have going on, because without my health, I have no other things. I should stop, listen to my body, and take care of this bleeding issue so I can get back on the road to booty kicking.

With all of that said, let me tell you why my hospital stay is being delayed. I want to be a daddy. Mandi and I have been going through the IVF process for a good two months now and it's getting into crunch time. "My part" is coming up in the next 10 days and I have to be available when I get the call. Depending on how Mandi's body responds to those big old shots we started giving her, I could be called for my sample anytime between February 5th to February 10th. It's kind of hard for them to take my baby batter out (if you were unclear) up here in Phoenix if I'm down in the hospital in Tucson. And even more important to me than that, 6 days after they get my sperm, they will be implanting an embryo into my wife. Every piece of my being wants to be there for her on our special day. I realize that the creation of our family is very unorthodox and it's not just a matter of a bottle of brandy and a hot tub, therefore, I want to be as much a part of this as possible. Make sense? Maybe not to you, but I know to us it's very important.

So there you have it, an update from clinic. As always, could be better, but it could be worse. I'd love it if you guys could keep us in your prayers for the next few weeks. Please pray that my bleeding lessens and that my health holds up until I can get into the Hole. Also, please pray that the rest of this IVF process goes smoothly and, God willing, we're able to start our family. Thank you guys so much for your support, your prayers and the continued reading of this blog.

The Beginning of the End

Yesterday was an exciting day! It was the first day of my HMG (stimulant) drug for our IVF cycle. I have been solely on Lupron (a drug used to put my body into "menopause" to shut it down and give it time to rest) since December 24th. I decreased my Lupron from 20 units, to 10 units on Friday, and I will continue on the 10 units all the way through the retrieval. The reason for staying on a low dose of Lupron during the stimulation of the ovaries is to keep me slightly suppressed, so my body doesn't ovulate on its own - we want to snatch up the eggs before I ovulate. So today I started my HMG injections, and man was I scared to start them. My Lupron is given in a dinky, tiny little needle in my belly, and is a piece of cake. However, I was dreading the HMG injections because they're intramuscular injections (meaning they need to be given into the muscle...which means a long, big ol' needle). I have done a lot of reading online about the whole IVF process, and many people complain about these shots. I was so nervous about starting these injections on Sunday morning, that I even had a little trouble sleeping on Saturday night. Part of me was nervous about the possible pain of the shot, but part of it was just being afraid that I'd over sleep (I have to give myself the shots between 7 and 8 am). I'm sure many of your are thinking, "you're a big weeny...it's just a shot." And to you guys I will say this, "you sound like my husband!" Ronnie has been telling me to stop psyching myself out - he knows my little mind gets me into a tizzy from time to time! And while I was nervous, it was an exciting day because it feels like it's the beginning of the end of this IVF cycle. It was over a month of injections, but we were at a holding pattern. These shots are getting my ovaries to start doing what they need to do, and within 12 days, we should have a bunch of eggs to fertilize...5 days after that we'll be putting embryo(s) back :)

All that said, check out the videos to see how my first shot went. You can see (and hear) my nervousness and uncertainty during the first video, and then you can two videos of the actual shot (that's right, we did TWO camera angles - professional huh?) - one is of my face while Ronnie gave the shot, the other is of the injection site.

I'll be on the HMG shots for 8-12 days - until my eggs are mature and ready to be taken. We have our first ultrasound to see how the eggs are looking on Thursday. We'll update you then! Please keep our process in your prayers!

Rondi's Reviews: 127 Hours

Last night we went to see 127 Hours - a movie based on one man's story of survival. Mandi is relatively easy to please when it comes to movies; while I like to pretend I'm Siskel and Ebert. Here are our thoughts on the movie....be sure to watch the trailer first!

Mandi's Review:

Before I give my review of the movie - I should preface this with the fact that I'm not a very strict movie critic. I tend to enjoy movies that keep my awake through them and keep me engaged. Those may seem like pretty low standards, but I fall asleep pretty quickly in movies. However, it doesn't take make for me to think it's decent.

As for this movie - I'd definitely recommend it to others, and I'd even go see it again. It's one of those movies that makes you question what you would do if you were in their shoes, and a movie that makes you (well maybe not YOU, but it definitely made ME) feel anxious most of the way through. I was so tense wondering how he was going to get out of the tight spot (pun intended) he was in. And while it seems like a movie filmed in one spot 90% of the time would be boring, it wasn't the case at all. James Franco (main character) did an incredible job throughout the whole film.

Best:

I love movies based on true stories. Something about movies based on reality makes me feel like it's possible that my own life, at some point, could also be extraordinary enough to be a movie. I know that seems really lame, and I think that may be the first time I've ever said (typed) that out loud. But it's true. There's something incredible about watching events that actually unfolded in someone else's life that I find intriguing and incredible. Especially when it's a story like this. A story that shows just how far one man would go to live. It makes me feel like I can, and should, be more extreme in my life.

Worst:

I still feel a little nervous, uneasy and sick. I love movies that get me emotionally invested in them...but when I'm tense for 2 hours straight, it takes me a little while to shake the feeling and remind myself that I'm feeling that way based on something that's not actually happening. However, this is a pro and a con - because at least the movie was good enough to make me feel emotionally invested.

Rating:

I'd give it a solid 4.5 stars.

Ronnie's Review:

Let me just cut to the chase, I certainly wouldn't name this "by far one of the best films of the year". With that said, if you're a fan of the inspired by true stories type of a guy or gal, then I would try to catch this one. The premise is pretty simple, guy goes hiking, guy falls, guy gets stuck, guy thinks he's going to die and then we watch him fight to live for 90 minutes. There's literally one actor with a bunch of extras. You get a sense of who the main character is through flashbacks and the first 10 minutes of the movie, but other than that, don't expect to get sucked in by Aron (James Franco). Not to say he didn't do a good job of acting, but I'm also not saying that this would be the toughest role to play (I'm a James Franco fan by the way). Just picture a thirsty man grunting and groaning a lot, got it? Good. You've now seen the movie.

Best part: The bloody scene. I won't say too much, but I can tell you that I thought Mandi was either going to pass out or throw up...I was smiling the entire time.

Worst Part: If you read any other reviews, or have read the book, you know how it ends. To be honest, about half way through, I was just hoping for him to get freed and get on with it, or die, either way, I was good.

Rating (Out of 5 stars): 2.5

Thankful Thursday - It's good to be home

We can't stress enough how important it is in our own lives to slow down when things seem to be getting "fast" and just think about the little things that we're thankful for. We had 9 other peeps join us last week in expressing their thankfulness and we're hoping that more climb on board today! I have a little "Linky Tools" at the end of this post that you can use to join the party and link up your thankfulness post! Feel free to spread this around to anyone you know that may like to participate.

Mandi's List:

I'm thankful that Ronnie is back from his two trips. Even though he was just gone for 2 days the first trip and 1 the second, I always miss him a little (LAME-O, I know). I enjoy having my partner in crime (not literally crime, please don't report us! Although it would be funny to be able to use that expression literally...maybe we'll become like Bonnie and Clyde). I always realize how much I appreciate having him around when he leaves for a few days. Last night, after he got home, we snuggled up on the coach and watched TV - Life.Is.Good!

I'm thankful for Jezzabel! Jbell is one good guard dog and makes me feel safe while Ronnie's not home. I have to admit - I'm the biggest scaredy cat you'll ever meet. Whenever Ronnie's gone over night, I get really scared that something will happen. It's a totally irrational fear. And even though my rational brain tries to convince my irrational brain that I'm an idiot the whole time that Ronnie's gone - I typically don't feel better unless Jezzabel is close by. I always tell Ronnie that if someone comes into our house with the way Jezzabel gets with strangers, I know I'm screwed because they're just crazy! I'm thankful to have a puppy that is so protective to snuggle with at night while Ronnie's gone.

I'm thankful for feeling good. I read a lot of negative feedback/stories from others who have been on the med (lupron) that I'm on for our IVF cycle. However, I have been on it for over a month now and haven't had any problems. I've had the occasional hot flash here and there and have been a little emotional (I cry at most TV shows now! haha) but other than that, nada. I am so thankful that my body is handling the process well so far, and pray that it continues to do well through the process.

Ronnie's List:

I'm thankful that I have a wife that can hold down the fort and then some while I'm away. Granted, she gets a little spooked from time to time, but that's something we're working through and sooner or later she will be wearing big girl panties 24/7. Other than that, she always does a great job while I'm away whether it's getting a ton of work done, doing stuff around the house or taking JBell on 492 walks. Maybe I should take the hint :)

I'm thankful for my many opportunities in the past week to speak with others in the CF community face-to-face. I had a great time hanging out with the folks up in Stony Brook and I was honored to be able to share some of my life with them and what I've learned over the years. I'm thankful that we didn't get snowed out either as that was always a real possibility.

I'm thankful for my first Vegas experience. Now, that town is WAY TOO smoky for me to make it a common stop, but I do hope to get back there with Mandi someday. When I walked into my hotel room, which may have been the nicest one I had ever stayed in, all I could think was, "Man I wish my wife was here". We're big time people watchers, so I think we would really enjoy each other up in Sin City for a bit.

A Mental Break

Yesterday was just what I needed. After a three days of working and traveling across the country, I needed to just unwind. It started with a nice long walk with Jezzabel in the morning. I went from a place (Long Island) with a high of 25 while I was there, to walking my dog at 9 o'clock in the morning with shorts and a t-shirt on. When I got back, my beautiful wife had some coffee ready and I vegged out on the couch for a bit catching up on the U of A game that I had missed on Saturday. I was able to get in all of my treatments today without issue and even got out for another long walk with Jezzabel (we even brought Mandi with us the second time). Yesterday was just a great physical and mental break for me.

Now, anytime that I have days like that, I'm certainly not able to completely disconnect from my normal duties, but I don't feel as pressured to get them done right away. As I sit and type this, I know that I still have e-mails to return, comments to reply to and some loose ends to be tied, but there isn't such a sense of urgency. It's nice to feel that once in a while. I turn right around and leave for another short trip today, but this time it's a much more manageable plane ride to Vegas. Which remind me, if anybody wants to meet up, let me know. I won't have too much free time, but I may be able to sneak in a coffee at some point late Tuesday or early Wednesday.

Point is, sometimes we just need to unplug and recharge. This is especially important when I start to feel a little worn down physically. All of the coughing up blood certainly didn't help last week (proud to report that I haven't coughed up any since Friday) but I think I may be on the mends now. I'm just looking forward to getting through these next few days and taking the weekend to unwind again. I'm looking at a possible hospital stay in mid-February and the hope is that I can maintain my lung function and my overall health until I can get in there. Wish me luck, I'm sure it will all work out :)

Updates from the Couch Potato

I figured I'd give a little update about what crazy things we've been up to.

(Silence. Crickets.)

That's how eventful things have been around here, and it's been AWESOME! This last week has consisted of work, working out and watching TV.

The highlight for me has been our workouts. It's been really nice to be back in the gym consistently, and actually WANT to work out. I've found that the last few weeks I've actually been eager to wrap up my work day so I could go get a workout in. Even better, most days we've done cardio I haven't been eager to be done. I think my new energy for working out is two-fold: 1. It's different. We've been so focused on running for the last several months, and the change of pace (elliptical, stairs, treadmill) has been nice. I find that if I'm sick of working out, if I just switch it up a bit, it becomes fun again. 2. I want to get into great shape before we're pregnant. I (POSSIBLY, with a capital P-O-S-S-I-B-L-Y) only have another month or so before I'm pregnant, and I want to start off the pregnancy in good shape, so I can hopefully remain very active! Sitting on my bum for 10 months sounds like a recipe for boredom and a whole lot of jiggle, so my goal is to work out as hard/much as my doctor thinks is appropriate!

This weekend consisted of a lot more relaxation (for me). Ronnie was in Stony Brook, NY to speak at a CF Education Day (was anyone reading this blog there??) so his weekend was busy, but I just held down the fort. Friday night I had a friend come spend the night (slumber party, what what!) We went to a movie (No Strings Attached - Love Natalie Portman, but it was a little crude for my comfort...the sex scenes were just awkward and the cussing and crude jokes were unnecessary). We then just sat on the couch and talked until we fell asleep. I was really nice to catch up. Saturday was full of more nothingness. We went shopping in the AM - we actually went to hike a mountain near by, but it was so packed that you couldn't get parking, so we decided we'd just shop instead!) The best thing about the shopping trip was that I actually bought something (good for me, bad for the savings account). Typically I just window shop. I'll even go as far as trying something on, but then talk myself out of it by saying something like, "I don't need another pair of black shoes." But I bought a pair of gray Converse, and they're awesome! After the mall, I rode my bike to the gym and got in a solid workout. That was the last of my activity for the day. I sat on the couch from 4pm until the Sunday morning (I even slept there). It is glorious. I watched TV and played Scrabble online (against Ronnie while he was doing his treatments in his hotel room in NY). It felt really nice to just regenerate! Sunday consisted of church, a nap, and then I went and picked up Ronnie. Let me tell you - I sure missed him. Isn't that stupid? He was gone for only 2 days and I missed him! I was so excited on my way to the airport to pick him up. We headed for a nice little happy hour (because Ronnie only eats out when the food is 1/2 price) and came home to (you can guess it) watch more TV. I think the couch may have a permanent butt indent after this weekend.

It was an uneventful, relaxing weekend (for me...I think Ronnie's pretty wiped). One of those weekends you wish would happen more often! Leave us a little comment and let us know how your weekend went. Did you have a lazy weekend like mine? Or a busy one like Ronnie's? Did anyone get snowed in? (I kind of felt like I was, since I acted as if I couldn't leave the house!) Need help having a lazy weekend? I found this while searching for a picture for this blog. Really? There's an article about this?

PS - A quick IVF update: I start my stimulant med on Sunday (1/30) and will be on it for 8-12 days. Then it's time for Ronnie's biopsy, my egg retrieval and 5 days later, embryo transfer. Everything is moving along very smoothly and we'll post another update next week. Please keep the process in your prayers!

Daycare or No Daycare?

I wanted to share this blog with all of you from Jen over at http://groettumfamily.blogspot.com/. She does a great job explaining her position on a much talked about issue that face CF families. Without further ado...

Why We Don’t Do Daycare (at other people’s houses)

** Before I even start, please remember that this is my blog, my opinions, my life choices…you may not agree with me all of the time (or ever!) but this is why we choose to keep Gavin home and not put him into a daycare. You may have a different opinion, and that’s all good, but like I said…this is my territory :)

So here we go, in no particular order…

First, we live in the frozen tundra.

If you were to look outside this morning, you too wouldn’t want to leave the house. We had gotten more snow overnight, and the wind was blowing like crazy…not exactly a comfortable atmosphere to hang out in. As much as we like to be outside year round, Mother Nature keeps us inside the majority of the winter season (winter here is often 5 months long) which means that our gross, sickly winter germs are contained in our homes/offices etc, making it much easier to get sick. And honestly, if you don’t live in a state where you have difficult winters? You just don’t get it…not trying to sound rude, but it’s the truth.

As much as I clean & sanitize, I can’t clean everything or everyone so obviously we’re going to get sick…but kids are walking Petri dishes, they pick their noses and immediately walk up to you and give you a high five. Yes, Gavin still gets tons of interaction with other kids. Our neighbors come over and play, we head to the mall play area, local indoor playgrounds, the grocery store play room, the jump house etc (and no I don’t walk around with hand sanitizer he plays just like any other kid)…but if I know that there is a major virus moving around town? We stick around the house.

Yes, I am opening a small daycare in our house. But that’s just it, it will be in my house. I know that when I say I clean I actually clean. I am constantly washing blankets/sheets/pillows and even his stuffed animals. I don’t have potted plants around the house (except for two very small ones in our kitchen window). I go through many of his toys once/twice a weak and wipe them down with disinfectant. I am in control of what illnesses/sicknesses I allow kids to have when they come into our house (minor colds/tummy aches etc are a-ok) and I have the control in sending kiddos home. I am able to be with Gavin through any extra treatment sessions he needs when he does get sick. To me there is a big difference in allowing your kids to be around some germs to build up an immune system, and sticking your child in a germ-filled daycare at 6 weeks of age.

I am at the age where nearly half (if not more) of my friends have toddlers/babies, and almost all of those kids are enrolled in daycare. I cannot even count how often those kids seem to be sick, and CF or no CF, that’s just not something I am willing to deal with. I also cannot count how many parents have talked with me, or visited our home, and discussed how disgusting some of the local daycares are, yech! In general, most home daycares are not clean enough to mystandards. And many friends have told me that they wish they could afford to stay home (ahem, you probably can if you aren’t a single parent making the only income, you just have to make a 180 change to your current lifestyle, but more about that later) whether their child has CF, another disease, or is completely “healthy.”

And honestly, after 2 or 3 kids many people need to step back and see if they are even coming out “ahead.” If you realize that after the cost of daycare you are barely making more money than if you stayed at home, then stay home! (if this doesn’t affect your health care). Your children are young ONCE, and if its the difference of a couple thousand dollars a year…skip that vacation, go out to eat monthly instead of weekly, stay away from the shopping mall, etc and enjoy your kids! They will never look back on their childhood and wish that you had spent more time at work.

Our CF team also informed us that keeping a child out of daycare, and healthier for the first three years of life (if that is possible for a family) has proven that the kids often “do better" health wise for longer, obviously this is not true for every child but it really does make sense to me. This is not saying that children who are placed in daycare will not do well, it is just saying that statistically, those that aren’t tend to be sick less & hospitalized less.

Secondly, is the fact that children learn more in their first two years of life than they will in their entire lifetime.

Gavin is about three weeks away from turning two and he can:

• recognize nearly 1/2 of the letters in the alphabet
• count to ten (and sometimes beyond) like it’s nobody’s business
• speak rather “fluently” – I have had several people tell me that they didn’t believe he could actually speak as well I say he can, until they saw it in person
• knows all of his colors and shapes
• has an insane memory for his age
• is extremely polite, he is constantly saying please, thank you and you’re welcome without being prompted to do so (if he doesn’t say please, he doesn’t get it!)

I 100% believe that he has achieved all of this so early because of the one-on-one attention he has received from day one. And not just from me, but from the family members/friends he is surrounded by. We read books for hours (seriously) every day, he has discovered that all of those letters at the bottom of the page make up the words to the story I am reading. We rarely watch crazy tv shows for kids, if we have the tv on we stick to PBS. Shows like “Super Why” and “Sesame Street” have gotten Gavin extremely excited about learning and he thinks he’s pretty cool when he answers questions that are far beyond his (almost) two years. All of this has made me realize that once I get this small daycare of mine up and running, that we will spend a major chunk of our day “learning” and not plopping them in front of the tv/just letting them run crazy because I’m worn out. Embedding as much new knowledge as possible into their little minds while they still think “school is cool” and aren’t yet complaining about that daily routine :)

Thirdly, we are willing to make sacrifices.

Sometimes pretty big sacrifices.

One income family means: no vacations, extremely rare fancy dinners/dates out on the town, never buying items that aren’t on sale, making what you have work rather than running out and buying new, making that dollar stretch as far as possible…and being ok with living that way. To us, being able to personally witness each of Gavin’s early accomplishments was far more important than having the nicest house, the most toys…the fancier lifestyle. Sure, having a large house would be nice…but we’re ok with being cozy. Sure, a vacation away from the snow would be nice…but for now we better enjoy snowshoeing and skiing, because the beach isn’t happening anytime soon.

I have also been doing tons of research on couponing. I do not plan on become a crazy coupon lady, but I have spent several days on different websites reading about other SAHM (stay at home mom) techniques. The biggest mind changer for me? Hearing a lady simply say, “A coupon is freemoney.” And I am not just talking about grocery store coupons. But also coupons for restaurants, theme parks, weekend adventures etc. Saving money, buying second hand, and recreating new items from old ones, are just some of the reasons we can “afford” for me to stay home during the day. On a different day I’ll share some of my newly learned “tips.”

In all, our choice to keep Gavin out of daycare goes far beyond him having CF and goes beyond any other “health reasons.” No, we are not the crazy parents walking around with hand sanitizer and pulling him away from every child that has a runny nose…if anything we’re too relaxed about his “interactions” with germs. Yes, Gavin’s CF made our final decision that much clearer. Yes, I choose to say that Gavin “cannot” be in daycare, because in my opinion? In order for him to continue to succeed (and again, not just talking about his health) at the rate he has? Daycare at someone else’s house is.not.an.option.

Lastly, until you have children of your own you have absolutely no right in judging another parents decision to place their child in daycare or to keep them home. Sure, you can have an opinion, but trust me…it’s better to keep it to yourself until you also have your own :) It is very easy to have “all the answers” of parenthood, until you hold that baby of your own for the first time.

Stony Brook Family Education Day

Cystic Fibrosis Education Days are a great opportunity for families to learn more about the advances and treatment of cystic fibrosis. On Saturday, the CF center of Stony Brook will be hosting this great event and I'm fortunate enough to be speaking at it. If you are anywhere near this center, I highly encourage you to check it out and please come up and say "hi".

I don't have too much information besides that. I just show up and they tell me what to do :)

Hope to see you guys there!!

Thankful Thursday - Support the Freezers?

We can't stress enough how important it is in our own lives to slow down when things seem to be getting "fast" and just think about the little things that we're thankful for. We had 3 brave souls join us last week in expressing their thankfulness last week and we're hoping that more climb on board today! I have a little "Linky Tools" at the end of this post that you can use to join the party and link up your thankfulness post! Feel free to spread this around to anyone you know that may like to participate.

Mandi's List:

I'm thankful for freezers. This may sound like a weird thing to be thankful for, but let me tell you what, our freezer saves us a TON of money. I can't imagine if we had to buy and eat everything fresh! We'd have food going bad all the time. It also makes dinner time easy when you can just pull out some frozen veggies, frozen chicken and vwalla!

I'm thankful for the TVs at our gym. We have been really good at getting in 30-60 minutes of cardio every time we go to the gym and a big part of that is because the time flies by since we're able to just watch tv shows. It's hard to say, "Naa, I'm done" when you're doing exactly what you'd be doing at home, only getting a work out in at the same time.

I'm thankful for email. My family constantly has emails flying back and forth with pictures from the day, forwarding on updates from work, filling each other in on happenings. It makes me feel like my family is really close, even with my parents far away. It's a nice, quick and easy way to stay plugged into each other's lives.

I'm thankful for friends who have been there/are there! I have been chatting with several ladies on CysticLife, Facebook and the phone who are all going through the IVF process right now, or have recently gone through it, and man am I thankful. It is so nice to chat with others about their experience, hear what to expect, and have someone who can relate to what you're experiencing. It's very awesome to have people to chat with!

Ronnie's List:

I'm thankful that although I've had some coughing up blood issues over the past couple of days, my PFTs haven't taken that much of a hit and I may be turning the corner. I'm not sure what brought on the sudden case of hemoptysis since I have been feeling great these past few weeks, but I'm just thankful that it wasn't worse. It can always be a little touch and go during times like this- I'm definitely going however!

I'm thankful for my upcoming opportunity to speak to the awesome folks at the Stony Brook CF clinic in Long Island, NY on Saturday. I was invited to speak at their CF education day and I'm always thrilled to be a part of these types of events. They fill a much needed knowledge and social gap in the community that I'm just honored to be a part of. If you're anywhere near Long Island, I'd love to see you there on Saturday!!

I'm thankful for a CF team that trusts me. Although I'm coughing up blood and my PFTs dipped a bit, they trusted me enough to make the call whether or not I needed a tune-up. I'm confident that this little set back was just a minor blip in the road and I'll be back on my game in no time. I of course promised them to keep up my four treatments a day, continue with additional airway clearance through exercise and hop on Cayston ASAP (which I'll be thankful for if it arrives tomorrow). It's so comforting to have trust amongst myself and the team, but I have a feeling it stems from two things: They know I love feeling good and they know I'll do anything to feel good.

I'm thankful for support. I feel support all around us coming from it feels like 1000 different places and people. We have great families, first and foremost, but we also have amazing friends and an amazing community behind us. Throughout this whole IVF process, we've been able to connect with others who have gone through (or are currently going through) similar situations on CysticLife. It's nice to be able to throw any and every question out to them and know it will be answered promptly, honestly and with eagerness to help.

San Francisco Scare

I've been meaning to post this video for quite some time now. It's from our trip to San Francisco last October for the CF Concert Series. Apparently this guy who uses a fake bush/tree to scare people is pretty well know (I had never heard of him), and after seeing it, I know why. Make sure you at least watch until 2 min and 35 seconds, it's literally a blood-curdling scream.

Freak Things Happen

So today Mandi and I were running around to doctors appointments, relaxing and, of course, observing MLK day the best that we could. Earlier in the day we had a fertility appointment to make sure that Mandi's eggs were still looking good and to go over how to give the shot that looks like a horse tranquilizer (I'm kidding, it's not that bad). We were also able to sit down with the doctor and go over some details about the whole process, which I'm sure we'll get into with you guys soon here on the blog. Just as a teaser though, stuff like how many eggs to fertilize, how many embryos to "put back" and what to do with the embryos we don't use at the moment. So as you can guess, it was quite the conversation, but we'll save it for another time.

Back to the part when we got back from the appointment. Wait a second, first let me set this up a bit. I've been feeling great. Mandi and I have been eating better. We've gotten back into the gym. We're getting back on track with exercise. I'm doing my treatments consistently and faithfully. I've noticed that my cough has decreased over the past couple weeks and my mucus has gotten lighter. All in all, no complaints, and I'm feeling pretty good. Now, I said all of that to say, today I coughed up blood, and a lot of it.

It was the weirdest thing. We pulled into our garage and just as I was getting out of the car, I felt it. It's a certain rattle that we get in our chest just before the blood comes up to play (you CFers know what I'm talking about). I walked out of the garage, coughed and spit. Sure enough. Bright. Red. Blood. I immediately made a dash for the bathroom sink because I didn't want to stain my rocks in the front yard! :) I coughed and coughed and coughed, each time bringing up the good stuff. There are different kind of coughing up blood episodes, those that just make your mucus a bit red and those that look like a murder scene. With each cough, blood splattered into the sink, and I'll I could do was hope that my aim was good. About 5 minutes and 1/2 cup of pure blood later, it stopped.

Ok, now what's the point? The point is, stuff happens. Stuff happens that we can't explain. Good stuff happens. Bad stuff happens. Life would certainly be a lot easier if we could explain everything, but it'd also be pretty boring. In this CF life, unexplained stuff can happen often. I think the key though is not what happens, but how we react. I didn't panic. I didn't get mad. I didn't stress out. Stuff happens. Stuff happens and we move on. Sure, I adjusted my treatment regiment today to try to prevent more blood, but other than that, I wake up tomorrow and I move on. I'll make sure to get four treatments in. I'll make sure to pay close attention to what my lungs are saying. I'll let my doctor know what's up on Wednesday when I have my (drug trial) appointment. Other than that, I do nothing different. I've been good lately about doing what I have to do to kick some CF booty. Faithful with my treatments. Faithful with exercise. Freaky stuff can still happen.

So I move on.

Happy Birthday Dad!!!

(Notice that this posted on your birthday :) )

The Secret to a Clean House: The 10-Minute Tidy

(Watch Video First)

Ok, I know there are a few things we're all thinking, so let's get them out of the way: 1) That grown woman pretending to be a giant baby is a little weird. 2) Who can do ANYTHING in 10 seconds? Unfortunately I can't fast forward through chores like that! 3) Why did you have that posted? I can never have those 37 seconds back!

My answers: 1) I agree! 2) No one can - I'll tell you how I've changed it for a real person to do. 3) I'm sorry, at least I didn't post a longer clip!

Well I wanted to share that video to talk about one of my all time favorite tricks that my parents did with us kids, and how it still works to this day. When we were kids (even through high school) my mom or dad (normally my dad) would say, "the house is a mess, let's help mom by all of us picking up for 10 minutes." They would set the timer on the over and we would all take off in different directions running through the house to see how much we could get done during the 10-Minute Tidy. And let me tell you, 4 people can get A LOT done in only 10 minutes (especially if you're running...which of course, being competitors, we did). Now, I will say, maybe it helped that my mom is a neat freak. So the house never got dirty, things would just get out of order - you know, shoes here, a sweatshirt there, toys on the floor, books on the table. But at the end of 10 minutes, the house was back in tip top shape.

To this day, I love a good 10-Minute Tidy, and Ronnie's nice enough to play along! I'm naturally lazy when it comes to cleaning. I can think of a million ways I'd rather spend my time. But 10 minutes is easy to mentally commit to, so it gets me started, and once we're on a roll, we'll usually continue to clean from another 10-20 minutes to complete the job. And man, at the end of those 10-30 minutes, the house looks so much better. We do a 10-Minute Tidy 2-3 nights a week, and it keeps the house from getting very messy.

Here's what we do:

Whole House -

Pick up/put away stuff out (7 minutes)

Swiffer tile/wood floors (3 minutes)

Kitchen -

Clean Dishes (empty/load dishwasher) (3 minutes)

Soft scrub counter tops (2 minutes)

Family Room -

Straighten pillows on sofa (we have a lot of pillows) (1 minute)

Put away remotes (30 seconds)

Bedroom -

Put away shoes/clothes (3 minutes)

Clear night stands (30 seconds)

TOTAL TIME: 20 Minutes (10 minutes per person)

If we get caught up and want to really get the house looking good:

Whole House -

Vacuum (10 minutes)

(Quick) Dust (10 minutes)

TOTAL (extra) TIME: 20 Minutes (10 minutes per person)

Give it a shot! We just did one yesterday, and man the house looks good :)

PS - Pass along any and all cleaning tips you have. I'm still a cleaning newbie (since this is my first home and the first time if I don't clean it, no one will). And, well, let's just say I'm really good at surface cleaning, but the deep cleaning (the kind that actually matters) I need some lessons!

When Life Gives You Lemonade

Lately, I've been thinking a lot about that old saying, "When life hands you lemons, make lemonade." You know this quote well, I'm sure. It seems like it's the go to when you're being told to make the best out of a bad situation. I've even heard variations of this quote, "When life hands you lemons...suck out all of the Vitamin C," "When life hands you lemons...ask for salt and tequila," "When life hands you lemons...find a kid with a paper cut" (that one's kind of mean, and I'm not sure it's really making the BEST out of a bad situation, sounds like sharing your pain with others?).

We've all heard this quote, and it's always said by someone meaning well. Telling us to make the best of the "sour" situation we're in. I often hear people using this term when talking about life with CF, or to people with CF. And while I get the motivation behind the statement, something, lately, isn't sitting right.

You see, this statement implies that the thing we're dealing with is inherently bad. But that may just be OUR perception of it. If the Lord gives you a struggle, in order to strengthen your character, your faith (and who knows what else) to further His plan and for our ultimate good, is that thing inherently bad? Romans 5:3,4 says: Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope.

I understand that the argument then becomes, "Right, but that's the point of the saying, something good (Hope/Lemonade) can be made out of something bad (Suffering/Lemons)." But my rebuttal is this: How drastically different would our view of hardships be if all along we viewed them as lemonade? What if we never had to force ourselves to create the lemonade out of the lemons? Instead, what if every hand we were dealt we assumed was lemonade? Some lemonade may be more sour, some may be very sweet, but never-the-less, it's all lemonade.

How would your life look if everything was lemonade? How would your view of your job change? How would your view of our marriage change? How would your view of CF change? How much easier would the day be, if everything was lemonade?

Baby Batter Appointment

Today, I go to what I am calling "The Sperm Doctor" for an initial consult before a procedure called MESA or TESA (to be honest, I don't know which one. I guess I'll learn tomorrow). I'll obviously be able to divulge more information as I learn it tomorrow or you could just ask Mandi because I'm sure that she's paid more attention to all of the details being thrown at us over the past few months. As I understand it, they need to go into my testicle and retrieve sperm. Again, not getting the procedure done tomorrow, just the consult.

For those of you that don't know, about 95% of CF men are sterile. I fall within that 95%. It's not that we don't have sperm, it's just that it can't come out. Here's a very quick and simple explanation. The testicle makes sperm and semen. A tube carries semen from the testicle and a tube carries sperm from the testicle to meet up with the semen. I, along with many men with CF, never developed the tube that carries the sperm to meet up with the semen. It's called a congenital absence of the vas deferens (if you want to get all technical). Since I don't have the tube to carry out the baby makin' process naturally, they have to go in and get the sperm.

So, today we go in and talk about what the procedure looks like and when it will be done...at least that's what I was told :)

Thankful Thursday - Mommas and Gyms

We can't stress enough how important it is in our own lives to slow down when things seem to be getting "fast" and just think about the little things that we're thankful for. We had 2 brave souls join us last week in expressing their thankfulness last week and we're hoping that more climb on board today! I have a little "Linky Tools" at the end of this post that you can use to join the party and link up your thankfulness post! Feel free to spread this around to anyone you know that may like to participate.

Mandi's List:

I'm thankful for the time I've had with my mom. I always love when she's in town, and she's leaving today :( We've had an absolute blast together the last 3 weeks, and I'm bummed to see her go, but man oh man am I so thankful that we have the great relationship that we have and that she'll be back relatively soon. I'm so thankful that she was able to be back in the states for 3 weeks.

I'm thankful for our gym. The last two weeks we've been back into our workout routine at the gym, and I LOVE it. I am so thrilled that we have such a wonderful gym, and one that is so close to our house. It eliminates the excuse of travel time - we just ride our bike there. How blessed are we that we can work out at a nice gym, that is close to our home!

I'm thankful for hot chocolate. I've cut out all caffeine because I read somewhere that cutting out caffeine can help the quality of your eggs, and even though my doctor said it won't effect anything if I drink caffeine, I cut it out just to be safe. But man, I miss coffee! I am so thankful that I at least have hot chocolate to start my day with!

Ronnie's List:

I'm thankful for mommas. Yesterday was my mom's birthday and I'm so lucky that she was the woman God punished with raising me. I'm not sure anybody else could have done it. My other momma, Nancy, is leaving town today and I'm sad that we're not going to have her around any longer. I am however thankful for the time we were able to spend together.

I'm thankful that Mandi and I have had the energy to nail our new routine. Granted, it hasn't been for very long, but so far so good. We're eating better, getting to the gym consistently and have been getting our run groove back. I'm hoping we can keep it up as you all know how important I think it is!

I'm thankful for our neighborhood. I was just thinking this this morning when I was walking Jezzabel. We have "green belts" that run through our hood with sidewalks weaving on them that make the most perfect walking path for our morning dog walks. It's very green and peaceful in the morning and doesn't really look or feel like the Arizona that I grew up in.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOMMA, LOVE YA!!!!

That's the Way It's Supposed To Feel

That describes my attitude towards CF for much of my life. Whether I was short of breath, had lung pain or a bloated stomach, my response was, "well, that's the way it's supposed to feel". As I've "matured" in this CF life, I've realized that I have much more control over this disease than I used to give myself credit for. You see, maturity isn't necessarily what you know, it's what you do with what you know. I've always been up on the latest medicines and treatments offered to the CF community, but I wouldn't be the first in line to take advantage of the "latest and greatest". It's certainly not the case that I didn't care, but in a sense, I didn't want to rock the boat. I felt fine. That's pretty common for us isn't it? Feeling fine. We figure that if we're not feeling horrible, we're ahead of the game. We get used to feeling "just ok" and that quickly becomes our normal while feeling "pretty good" becomes the peak of which we think is possible and feeling "awesome" seems out of reach.

This couldn't be more true in regards to my digestive enzyme choice over the years. I was taking the same PEP (pancreatic enzyme product) for as long as I can remember and because I never had much trouble putting on or maintaining weight, I figured it was doing it's job. Problem is, a PEP should be that and so much more. While I was maintaining weight, I did my best to ignore all of the stomach pain, bloating, inconsistent stools and frequent runs to the bathroom. It had been occurring for so long I figured it was "just the way I was supposed to feel". It wasn't until my hand was forced that I ever even thought about switching enzymes. I mean, why rock the boat right?

When the new FDA regulations came out regarding PEPs, I had no choice but to hop off the sinking ship that I was sailing. I had heard rumblings in the CF community about a new enzyme hitting the market called Zenpep. After doing a little bit of research on my own, I decided to approach my doctor with the information I had uncovered and suggested that I make the switch. He agreed and my journey with Zenpep has been a good one. Instead of being bloated after every meal, I now only look pregnant if I over do it on fast food or pizza (I'd assume that falls in the category of- it's that way for everybody). My stools have become more consistent and it doesn't feel like I'm sitting on a toilet for most of the day. I'm still maintaining myweight, but like I said, that's never been an issue for me.

The biggest thing that Zenpep has done for me was made me realize that "that's NOT the way I have to feel". I got stuck in the "just the way it is" mentality and it was that little blue and white pill that snapped me back into reality. Things CAN change. You DON'T have to settle for "just ok". You DO have options when it comes to PEPs and other meds. I'm very happy that I made the switch to Zenpep and so far, there's no looking back...

...I just wish I would have woken up sooner.

"That's Not Supposed to be There!"

Warning: Detailed account of our IVF process, including detailed descriptions of procedures done to check out my reproductive health. You may want to steer clear of this post if words like "uterus," "cervix," and "speculum" freak you out!

Our first cycle of IVF is moving along beautifully. We are now 2.5 weeks in, and so far, so good. When I last posted an update, we had had some blood work done, and had just started Lupron (the drug used to shut my body down for a month before ramping it up). The Lupron shots are a piece of cake and I've been able to give them to myself most days. A few days I have totally psyched myself out and not been able to actually stick the needle in, so I had to call in my reinforcement, Ronnie. It no longer leaves a red mark and rarely itches, so I guess my body is getting used to it. I'm on Lupron for another 2.5 weeks. The only other addition in my daily routine is that I've been taking prenatal vitamins. I've had very few side effects from either. Some say on Lupron you can get hot flashes, I haven't experienced any. The only issue I've had (and I'm not sure if it's from the Lupron or the prenatal vitamins) is I've not had much of an appetite and felt a little bit nauseous. Nothing horrible, just a little bit uneasy feeling and I feel hungry, but as soon as food hits my stomach, it feels full. Also, I was prescribed a z-pack to take the 2 days before, the day of, and 2 days after the diagnostic tests I'll talk about in a second...

While we assume I don't have any infertility problems, they still have to check everything out. So last week I went to have a few more diagnostic tests done, both tests are used to look at the uterus and make sure there aren't any issues in shape and check that there are no cysts or polyps. The first test I had done was a Sonohysterogram. This one was done in my infertility doc's office. I was a little nervous about it because I read that it can be uncomfortable, but it wasn't too bad. So here's how they do it:

To perform the procedure a device called a speculum is used to open the vagina and expose the cervix. The doctor cleans and sometimes numbs the cervix (I believe my doctor just cleaned). They clean with a little foam pad looking device and you can't really feel anything but a little pressure. Then the doc inserts a small tube through the cervix and into the uterus. For me, this was easier said then done, and the worst part of the whole thing. Turns out, I have a tough cervix to get through - maybe because I'm small, but mainly because I haven't had any kids. He tried to feed the tube through - which feels like you're being pinched/stabbed in your nother-regions - several times before deciding to use a dilator, a tool that allows them to slowly make the opening just big enough to then feed the tube through. **At this point, my doctor did something that was not part of the Sonohysterogram. He did what he refers to as a mock transfer. In which he measured the depth and angle of my uterus, two things that will help him know where to put the embryos during the transfer. Additionally, he made note of the trouble getting through my cervix, so the day of the transfer he can get through my cervix with ease, not disrupting everything. Now, back to the Sonohysterogram - The tube pumps a harmless, sterile saline solution into the uterus, which expands the uterus and makes it easier to see. Then, the doctor uses the ultrasound probe in the vagina to generate an image of the expanded uterus for a few minutes. This is where we ran into a little scare. The doctor had my uterus up on the screen and said, "Wow, that's not supposed to be there," pointing to a big blob attached to the inside of my uterus. He began telling us that it looks like it could be a cyst, which would mean surgery, but they first would try to "knock it loose" with the water they were filling me with. I just about lost it. I felt a lump in my throat forming, but tried to play it cool and wait to see if they could knock it off. Luckily, after a few blasts of water, the blob just disappeared, like magic. He was very shocked, but please and confident that it was just left over tissue from my last period, so we were back on track. He took a few pictures of my uterus and after examining the image of the uterus, he removed the probe, and the saline solution drained...and drained...and drained from the uterus. They are nice enough to give you a GIANT pad (we're talking practically a diaper) to wear home to keep your car from turning into a slip and slide. All in all, it was an easy procedure, the scare of the cyst was just a scare, and the worst part was getting in through Fort Knox, I mean my cervix.

The next procedure that I had done last week was a Hysterosalphingogram, which was done at a medical imagine center. This is much like the Sonohysterogram, but instead of water, this time it's contrast and you're on what looks like a giant xray table. Once filled with liquid, they pulled this GIANT machine over my tummy, and looked at my uterus, ovaries and tubes on a screen - just like a sonogram would look, but instead of being transvaginal this time, it was over-top of me. This was pretty incredible, you could actually see my uterus, tubes and ovaries clear as day. They pumped the liquid into the uterus and watch it to make sure it fills the tubes and the ovaries, this checks for any blockages in the tubes, etc. Again, this one was quick, and relatively painless.

Both tests weren't bad, just gave me some cramping (which felt much like menstrual cramps.) We were pleased to find out that everything checked out perfectly and that we're still on track for an end of January egg fest :)

We have our next appointment on January 17th for an Ultrasound, physical exam and PreART consult with the RN. We'll update after that! Keep the process in your prayers! So far, so good!